I shut my mouth with you

last weekend and few days back was too intense so far to actually write about it, so i'll put it in point form:

Saturday
- met A at town
- supposed to look for jobs but too lazy
- hating the crowds in town
- went down to hollandv instead
- dinner at "flowershop foodcourt"
- headed down to my place
- chilled by the pool on some beach loungers
- listened to music, sing, talk, fag, drink, eat sweets, dance, laugh, falling down; until 4am+ we both went home
- K.O. right after my bath
- waking up with bruises on my butt and somehow my back's aching

Monday
- the official day of my last olvl exam
- woke at 6am
- went to fhss and took the exam at 8
- met Yvonne at clementi for threading & breakfast
- crashed Y's place
- watched brokeback mountain(finally!). Y's mom walked in during one of the making out part, DAMMIT!
- Y: "what if A tells you one day that he's gay?" Me: "NOOOO! DONT GO THERE YUQING, DONT!"
- Y went to meet her guy and i went to meet A
- dinner at hollandBK
- chilled around
- polluted noise and attracted unwanted attention in the hollandv neighbourhood with A's harmonica (i learnt how to play a song!)

Wednesday
- job interviewed at ikea with Y
- went down to yewtee and waited for Nad
- N came and we head to deb's place
- finally got to meet Deborah after sooo fucking longxcorex
- all of us hugged and all
- Deon's 1st month mini party/celebration
- buffet was good
- we camwhored like crazy
- Deon became the overnight-celebrity
- laugh, talk, smile(at the baby & for the cameras)
- took turns to carry Deon. & made my first attempt to carry a baby! FIRST TIME, MAFAKAS!
- goodbyes and hugs
- got home really shagged
- fantasize life with my own baby on the bed before i fall asleep
- im very inspired to become a mother, lols

Friday
- met deb at jurongmrt
- reminiscing the good'ol days with D in train
- we job interviewed at taka
- window shopped at taka
- then to wisma and lucky plaza
- elton dropped by
- i left the 2 lovebirds and went for another interview at marinasq
- the shopowner who interviewed me, hates me. i just knew it. shes so xialan with me can! vagina..
- took bus home from cityhall
- emo-ed in the bus cos nobody wants to hire me =..(

PS. i always wonder what does old horny men do, now i know. Lemon Party!

;6:38 PM

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

I've been thinking 'bout, whats the shit about
contraband fags are fucking up my throat! ive got like tonnes of thick-yellowish phlegm and urrgh its irritating. anyways i met Y today after her exam and we made a trip down to vivo, and therefore, I AINT A VIVOCITY-VIRGIN NO MORE BIATCH! i felt like a 3 yr old as i stepped into the mall, i was like so jumpy and all haha. oh yea, there's this period of time, me and Y pretended to be like some japanese tourist(cos we have eyes like the japs -_-) in vivo looking at menus and talking in our own modified japanese lang. crazy. as my "personal tour guide", Y brought me around exploring the mall, window shopped etc etc. and guess who we bumped into, the m.i.a girl from our clique; CHARIS ONG with AUNTY ONG(HER MOM)! haha yea. me and Y then resumed our outing by having dinner at banquet, chilling by the bay, reviving THE SINGING BABES, camslutting and taking some slapstick-funnyass vids in an isolated toilet. our outing ended by waiting at the bustop and enjoying the long bus-ride home. frankly i dont fancy vivo much cos of its crowd, i appreciate my first time there tho.. yar. shagged, very.

and i guess life's not really like that, cant get all caught up and wish for something thats not going to happen. you have to hold on to the next best thing. sighhh..

;11:43 AM

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Light My Fire
drama drama drama! and if i were to begin elaborating on what happened right now, i wouldnt finish for a very long time.

i couldnt ask for anything more than to finally having a 10-days break from the exams. the past whole week was full of stress, mugging(yalah not that much but still enough to kill me), limited sleep and dramas(like ive mentioned). im so tired, so damn very tired. i cant wait to take my last paper on the 20th, not that i give a fuck about science mcqs, just that i wanna get over and done with this shit. i feel like a fucking freak when i gotta wake up so damn early for the past 5 days(for the exams), thats not how i live man.. luckily theres no exams till 20th, so i woke at 6:20pm today, felt fucking great. rotted on my sofa and had peanutbutter&jelly sandwich for "breakfast". after "breakfast", i took the Classified out and started looking for jobs. and this very one advertisement caught my eye; "PRIVATE DETECTIVE WANTED. intensive training, bike&camera, salary 2K-5K" isnt this cool or what! but nah, im not into the sherlock holmes/james bond shit. after few mins theres several ads cut-offs on my table but im too lazy to go make enquiries, so i went on to clean my com desk and then caught few episodes of the L word. el word = shane/kate.M = my ideal lez partner. i'd so do kate i tell ya. i think im gender confused right now? i feel like a bi, or am i not? or am i just heterosexual? i felt like the Theresa i used to live in(just a lil more hardworking this time and a lil more gay). riiight. haha. alright, not funny. go and die lah, confused bitch.

talking abt dying, my ideal death scene would be a fast and painless death on a bed. i dont wanna die slowly, its depressing and so painful to watch(for my loved ones). after my death, the people who loved me will mourn, and those who fucking hate me will celebrate. a funeral with people crowding the church wouldnt be appropriate. the fewer people present, the better. i just want my family/relatives and friends who are really sincere about visiting me for the last time at my death bed to be there.

this aint a suicide note, dont worry. just thinking.. hah so much for death. one things for sure. im sick of trying so hard to make anything and everything work. and in the end i only get half way there. couldnt things get any better?

there's like this bloody demon fucking with my head.

[edit] btw, HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY CHARIS! looove ya! [/edit]

;9:51 PM

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

The L Word.
normally im pretty okay with whatever goes goes. but i really hate it when things dont go how they were supposed to and people end up changing their plans, especially when you were looking foward to it for once, and things were seeming to look up.

i would turn gay for kate moennig. serious.

i
you
we
together
come on
baby let's go!

;9:56 PM

Saturday, November 04, 2006

i am good enough.
i am not good enough.
i deserve better.
i deserve nothing.
i am somebody.
i am nobody.
its not my fault.
its all my fault.

;2:14 AM

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Never really did ever quite get that far

if girls wipe back to front, they get AIDS(?)
if guys wipe back to front, they get poopballs

eeew.

;11:41 PM